Tonight I Wanna Cry Sam and Daniel
by phoenixmagic1
Summary: S/D one shot. Part 3 of a 3 part series. Based on the song by Keith Urban. Sam and Daniel continue their relationship. but will they live thru Daniel's drinking? Character death. Please R&R! AU.


6/19/2008

9/5/2008

Disclaimer: I don't own Sam or Daniel, they're owned by MGM, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I don't own the song "Tonight I Wanna Cry". It's sung by Keith Urban, from his CD "Be Here". Written by Keith Urban and Monty Powell.

Rated T Please R&R

A/N: This is the sequel to "You Look Good In My Shirt Sam and Daniel" Established Romance and AU. Part 3 in a 3 part series. This story takes place 5 years after "You Look Good In My Shirt Sam and Daniel".

A/N 2: My apologies for this being late, I'm currently dealing with a lot of real life issues at the moment.

Daniel Jackson sat in his apartment alone and drunk. It was a late Thursday night and he was drunk while watching TV. Now Daniel wasn't the kind of man to always drink. He didn't have a high tolerance for alcohol but in spite of this knowledge he was a social drinker when it came down to it, at parties and celebrations. Daniel sat on his couch and watched TV and listened to various CD's. The blue eyed, brown haired archeologist wasn't the kind of man to drink by himself, but tonight he made an exception.

On any other Thursday night, Daniel would either be at work in his office or he would be out with Sam. His blue eyes filled with tears as he thought of her. Daniel pushed himself up from the couch and for a few seconds he was upright, then he fell back down onto the couch. After a few other desperate attempts, the man successfully got himself to his feet.

The CD he had playing was just background noise, same as the TV that was currently on, but muted. He didn't pay attention to any of the songs being played, but as he listened to the CD through his drunken haze, one song in particular caught his attention.

_Alone in this house again tonight  
I got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wine  
There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me  
The way that it was and could have been surrounds me  
I'll never get over you walkin' away_

The first verse began as Daniel staggered around his apartment, often holding onto the wall for support as he blearily looked at the photographs on the walls. There were pictures of him and Sam on their 2 year anniversary which they spent skiing at Lake Tahoe. Neither of them had been, but they decided to do something they'd never done before and skiing seemed like the perfect holiday. Daniel wiped away tears as he looked at the two of them smiling. The drunken man took a pull from the bottle of alcohol he held in his hand. He continued on looking at more pictures.

There was another picture of Daniel and Sam, once again all smiles, dressed to the nines as they celebrated their 3 year anniversary at a very elegant restaurant with candles and wine and dancing. Daniel put his finger tips on the photo where Sam's smile was and knew that he would never see her smile like that again.

_(Chorus)  
I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show  
And I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-control  
But I'm just drunk enough to let got of my pain  
To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain  
From my eyes  
Tonight I wanna cry_

Daniel continued to drink and stumble around the room looking at various other pictures: pictures of them celebrating their own birthdays as well as their team members, Christmas', New Years', Valentines Day and many other happy occasions. At one point, Daniel got fed up with anger and he grabbed a random photo from the wall and threw it across the room and it shattered against the wall. It was only until Daniel staggered over to where the photo fell that he recognized which photo it was.

It was taken at their latest anniversary celebration, neither of them looked particularly happy. The light had gone from their eyes and the smiles they now showed to the world were forced. Daniel leaned down and picked up the picture, knocking off the shards of glass. With the picture in one hand and bottle in another he made his way back to the couch and sat down. Tears filled his eyes and he recalled the night that picture was taken.

Daniel and Sam had a great relationship at first, but in the later years, specifically the last year they argued constantly about everything. These weren't your typical yelling and crying arguments, they were knock down, drag out fights which ended with Daniel going and getting drunk at a bar and calling Sam and yelling at her more. Mostly their fights were about how Daniel was becoming more and more depressed, becoming more of an introvert like he naturally was and isolating himself from her and from his team.

Sam tried her best to try and get Daniel to open up both at work and at home. She even had the team intervene on his behalf. Sam even threatened to call Jack and get Jack to come and see Daniel. Nothing worked.

Sure they put on a brave face while at work and such, but their relationship was crumbling and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

_Would it help if I turned a sad song on  
"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're gone  
Or maybe unfold some old yellow lost love letters  
It's gonna hurt bad before it gets better  
But I'll never get over you by hidin' this way_

_(Chorus x2) _

Daniel sat there, holding the picture letting the tears flow as he recalled the love letters they used to send each other while at work. He smiled briefly as he recalled how he would find them in his office at the most opportune times, like when he needed a hug, or when he was in a really good mood from a recent breakthrough of deciphering an Ancient artifact. Those love letters they used to send each other really made him smile; now he just cried.

Daniel continued to sit there on his couch listening to CD's, looking at the picture in his hand and drinking bottle after bottle of alcohol. He didn't care one bit about what he was doing. Nor did he care who he hurt in the process.

Life without Sam was unbearable and he tried his hardest after she left him not to immediately drink. But the urge was too strong and his willpower was too weak and he gave in. On more than one occasion Daniel found himself either at home or at a hole in the wall bar, one that he knew no one would ever find him in. He had found it one night while driving after work. It was a smelly, dingy, bar located 50 miles outside of the SGC and his home. But mostly he drank at home and was pretty good at keeping up appearances of doing well whenever his team mates dropped by for pizza or to watch TV.

Daniel knew that what he was doing was wrong, the constant drinking, the hiding of his drinking etc. He didn't care any more about anything. Not about his health, his job, or his life. If he had the choice of getting fired from work or spending his days and nights drunk, he'd choose the second one. In fact Daniel almost did get fired from work because he came into work drunk as a skunk and everyone but him noticed. General Landry told him to straighten up and fly right or turn in his resignation. The General had no tolerance for alcohol use on base. For a while Daniel seemed to sober up for the sake of keeping his job and pleasing those around him. But in reality, he was up to his old tricks as usual.

Sam was deeply hurt over this. She wanted so badly to help Daniel, but she had done all that she could do and now he was left to his own devices. It was up to him, if he lived or died.

The night of Daniel's death came as somewhat of a surprise and shock to those who knew him best. The news reported that he had died in a car accident when he had been drinking and driving late one night and his car had crossed the double yellow line and he hit, head on a young couple. The speed of the car, the force of the impact, the use of no seatbelt and the amount of alcohol present were all factors. It was determined that Daniel died on impact. The other couple suffered injuries as well, but they recovered.

The world was a sadder place since Daniel had died. The members of SG-1 all did their best to console each other during this tragic time. After the funeral, Sam, once again took it the hardest and cried for days and weeks and months on end. Meanwhile, Cameron, Teal'c and Jack all had their own way of honoring their friend. As a team, they sold Daniel's home and each took a large part of his personal belongings with them to their own home, as a way to always honor their friend and colleague. He would never be forgotten.


End file.
